One Man's Window

What. The. F*ck? This is supposed to be Canada. A country synonymous with snow. Where the National Sport is Ice Hockey. Ice Hockey. Where Polar Bears roam the lands. And where Penguins would join them. If it weren't for geographical restraints. This has been blatant false advertising folks. Don't let them fool you, Canada is a tropical country! I'm literally melting from the heat. It's been a week now of 28C+ weather, and I haven't so much survived as existed. The worst part is, this is still technically SPRING!!! It's going to get hotter. People are taking great pleasure in telling me as much, anyways. As much as I asked how people didn't travel south in the Winter, I'm can't quite fathom how they didn't travel north in the Summer. Seriously people, give me a snow flurry any day of the week. . . . And now, because it's too hot to think, which is needed to write, that is all.

Today, Monday May 24th, I turn 10,000 days old. It's true that boredom leads to such discoveries, but I still feel like that was 5 minutes well wasted. Anyways, in honour of this momentous occasion, I've decide to share with you some of the priceless lessons life has taught me. Use this wisdom wisely, for I did not come by all of it easy! - sneezing into an air vent is not a good idea. - badgers break bumpers. - if it seems too good to be true, it is. but try it anyways. - football fandom brings more heartache than reward. if it doesn't, it's not true fandom. - trust your 7 iron. - find yourself a scapegoat. make sure you're not somebody else's. - ignore peer pressure. don't give a fuck about what that ponce with the hairdo thinks about you because you'll all look back in fifteen years and cringe anyways. - women are a mystery. be that through their own mysteriousness, or my idiocy, they shall remain so. - toilet breaks on road trips are directly related

Again I find myself beginning this blog with a familiar apology. I'm sorry I haven't been more active here. I know you're all starving for a 5 minute read, be it sub-par, ill-conceived or just downright tripe. Regardless, this time I actually have a valid reason for my tardiness. This past week I had the pleasure of showing my mother and sister around Toronto, and giving them a decent insight into my new life here. While my sister has visited North America before, it was my mother's first time outside Europe, and I was keen to impress that the colonies have much to offer. Sadly, the weather wasn't entirely in our favour for the week, but while I lagged behind them, visibly withering under the demands of the Eaton Centre, they seemed to enjoy the marathon of shopping. We did get a couple of days of sun, just so some of the photos can look tropical. Their pictures from a day-trip to Niagara in particular are pretty spectacular. We didn't get to see everything I wo